Working on Thanksgiving is Not a New Gig

Much has already been said about the black hole that is Black Friday. I couldn't agree with this sentiment more. I know, I know, I usually DO shop Black Friday. Yes, for years, it's been a fun tradition with my mom and sisters. We never waited in line for hours, saw anyone trampled, or tried to compete for the $200 TVs. It was just a time for us to get away from the cooking and cleaning, spend time together, and snag a few deals.

 Black Friday 2011

However, the last few years, the store opening times have gotten earlier and earlier, and it got less and less fun. This year, enough is enough. We're not shopping today, even to go to the grocery store. We may shop at some point tomorrow, but not anywhere that was open on Thanksgiving. We're not alone in this pledge.

Settle down. That's not the point of my post today.

I certainly share the disgust that American consumerism has led to retail stores taking Thanksgiving and family time away from their employees. However, let's not forget about those workers who tirelessly and selflessly serve us 365 days a year, 24 hours a day, including holidays. 

By all means, bemoan the plight of the retail worker. Fight back against consumerism. But also, take a moment to give thanks for those not with their families today because they are

taking care of the sick,

keeping us safe,



taking care of people who don't have anyone to spend the holidays with, answering the phone at a 24-hour call center, or filling up our gas tanks as we hit the road to visit Grandma.

And please, give a special thanks for those who are extra far away from their families today because they are protecting our freedom.

Are you looking for a way to go beyond boycotting Black Friday?

• Take a plate of food to that security guard or gas station attendant you talk to every week.
• Write a letter of thanks to your local police or fire department or write a note on the department's Facebook page.
• Drop by the hospital with some desserts for those hard working doctors and nurses.
• Write a letter to a currently deployed service member or wounded warrior.

At the very least, as you are sitting down with your families today, say a prayer of thanks for all of those working today and tomorrow, regardless of occupation.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Happy 9 Months!

This is the 9 month post I wrote a while back (on July 22nd, about a week after he turned 9 months) and never got around to posting. I definitely need to write an updated post, but for now, here's a snapshot of Joshua @ 9 months.

 

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You are growing so very fast. I can't believe all the things you are learning every day.

You are crawling on all fours now, rather than the "army crawl" of last month. Every other move forward, you kind of "push off" with your right foot. It's pretty funny looking, but I guess it gets you where you need to go! You are not a fan of me leaving the room or area you are in, and you will immediately crawl after me all the while telling me all about how unhappy you are. I do want you to be able to play independently and not need mommy around, but since I see you so little during the week, I can't help but humor you. On the other hand, if we're playing in a room and YOU decide to follow the cat or go exploring, you are just fine leaving me behind.

You love your walker, but we had to put it outside so it didn't scratch the floors. You figured out how to back up and turn (sort of) and are pretty speedy with that thing unless you run off the patio into the grass.

You don't seem to like stroller walks as much, though you still love being outside and exploring. Your eyes seems a little sensitive to the sun, I think because they are so blue.

You still love food of all kinds. You really haven't rejected anything we've given you. You make really funny sounds when you eat "mmmm, mmm, mmm" is kind of what it sound s like. Despite the fact that you put all your toys in your mouth, you refuse to feed yourself  food. I can't quite figure that one out.

New foods:

Arborio rice ("risotto")
Millet
Zucchini
Peaches
Sweet potato "puffs"
Green beans
Pears
Ground turkey

You pull up on almost anything, and you love walking assisted (holding our hands) all around the room. You even someone figured out the concept of kicking a soccer ball already! We're working on rolling/throwing the ball back and forth. I think you understand how it works, because when we roll the ball to you, you grasp it when it reaches you and just laugh. You can't really roll it back with any sort of accuracy though. :-)

Speaking of laughing, I love discovering the things that randomly "crack you up." The other night I imitated you saying "bah bah bah, bah bah bah" in a sing-songy voice. You laughed, so I kept doing it, and you got so tickled! Daddy thinks I was telling jokes in baby language. You also laugh and laugh when we tickle you. It's kind of become part of our bedtime routine to wear you out with a tickle attack.

If you could reach the doors, I've no doubt you could open them. You also know how to turn on the water in the sink and would no doubt turn the shower on if it wasn't covered with a soft spout cover.

Your favorite toys continue to be things that you can bang and shake, like rattles and empty bowls or boxes. You also like your blocks, banging them and knocking them over after we stack them. You still like playing at your standing table and with your "work and play" bench. On your work and play bench, there are three "pegs" that light up as the music plays. We caught you the other day actually pounding the one that was lit up in order to make the music continue. Of course we tried to get it on video but you were "over it" by that point.

Mommy went on her first overnight trip away from you! I was gone on a work trip to North Carolina for two nights, but Daddy had you for bedtime routine for 3 nights. You guys all did SO well! I missed you bunches though! You had a little bit of a tough time going to sleep the first night, but the next nights went much better. The day I left Jenny brought Ellyette with her, which was a huge blessing. You love playing with Ellyette and were totally distracted as I left, instead of crying (you've been a little more clingy in the mornings lately). I wanted to skype with you and Daddy but we were worried it might upset you too much. :-( I miss seeing your smiling face. Jenny sent me a few cute pictures. In one, you were listening to a kids' concert at the library and she said you were "captivated."

 

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I'm wrote the above post while I was on the plane back from my business trip. I feel like there was more I should have added, but I'll leave it as-is, so I don't get confused about stuff he's doing now. :-)

7 Months

My Joshua... You are 7 months already! Remember when I was going to write a blog post every month? Well you've kept me a little too busy for that. Oh, also we moved across the country, lived in a hotel for a month, bought a house, and mommy and daddy both got new jobs. We've had a million changes in our lives so far together, and you have been such a trooper! Such a laid back dude. You got that from dad, I'm sure. :-) Here's a picture of us in front of our new house!

Here are a few snapshots to get us caught up:

3 months: You find (and LOVE) your toes!
4 months: You roll over from tummy to back
5 months: You roll over from back to tummy
6 months: You roll all over the place and learn to sit up! You get your first tooth. (ouch!)
7 months: You can turn yourself 360 degrees on your tummy and can almost pull yourself up.

You've had your first trip to the beach, your first trip to the lake, and your first boat ride! You've flown over 10,000 miles!

You are much more stable sitting up, though we still have to stay close by so you don't throw yourself to the side to get back on your tummy. You love being on your tummy and scooting/rolling around is your favorite way to get where you want to go. I just know you are really close to crawling, though you may skip straight to walking! You like to stand and play with toys, but you still need lots of support.

You get bored easily and, like mommy, have to "get out of the house" at least once a day. You love walks in the stroller, in the Ergo, and in the sling. Last weekend (Mother's Day) we played outside on a blanket in the back yard for a long time! You like pulling at the grass and looking at it in your hands. In general, you love being outside! If you are ever upset, just a quick step outside and you cheer right up!

You are great at trying new foods. You've had avocado, banana, peas, sweet potatoes, carrots, and apples. You pretty much chow down on all of it, except maybe peas (but I think that might be a texture thing). Mommy is pretty proud of herself that she's been making all your food! We're still trucking right along with the breast feeding. We've been blessed that it has gone so well! You are also having water now, on occasion.


You gave us quite a hard time the last few months with your lack of sleeping. You would wake up every 1-2 hours and the only way you'd calm back down and go to sleep was to nurse. Even still it would take 2-3 tries to get you back to sleep. Mommy was very very tired, and you weren't getting a good night's sleep either! Last weekend we started "sleep training," and it has been amazing. You caught right on and we only had a few tears. By the 3rd night, you were sleeping through the night with just a couple of "dream feeds." Now, less than a week later, you are almost night weaned and are sleeping about 7-7. You are so much more rested and happy, and I am too!

You love your daddy so much and I do too! Enough said. :-)

You've been doing great with your nanny, Jenny. She's been just the right fit for our family! With my new job, I'll be having to go back into an office instead of working from home, and I trust that she's going to take great care of you, give you lots of snuggles, sing to you, take you to cool places, and really become a part of the family. I will miss you bunches and bunches while I'm at work, but we'll have good snuggle time and play time in the morning and when I get home.

You are the smilingest (it's a word) baby I've ever seen. I realize I'm biased, but seriously, everyone tells us that. You smile at everyone you meet! In fact, if someone doesn't smile and interact with you, you genuinely seem confused. You also laugh a lot! You laugh at mommy and daddy when they make funny faces or funny noises. You for some reason laugh at random guys. The only commonality I've noticed is that if the guy is between say, 14 and 30, and is wearing athletic shorts and a t-shirt...you seem to think they are hilarious. Random teenager at Subway behind us in line. Guy at the park playing a guitar. Delivery guys. It's a little weird, but it usually makes people smile!

Your favorite toys are ones that make music when you pound on them (you have a singing work bench, a car, a push toy, and your piano mat of course), or toys that crinkle or squeak. You love Sophie, especially when your teeth are really bothering you. You don't seem to care for other teething toys that we've tried. You also love books and can turn the pages on your own. You can pass a toy from one hand to the next, and you like to turn and twist things. Daddy says you have "the knack." I don't doubt it! You are SO over your swing, bouncer chairs, etc.

You already like electronics way more than your toys. You will go for the remote, the phone, even the baby monitor. You've figured out how to make the white noise machine into a toy. You will bang on it until it changes to music and then back to white noise. I've tried to feed you while on a conference call, and you get too distracted by my headset and the computer!

This might have been a boring post. Whoops! I just wanted to write down all the things on my mind that I wanted to remember in the future. A little snapshot of where we are at the moment. I can't wait for the next things to come!

I love you so much!
Mommy

(Not So) Displaced Midwesterners

That's right, folks, you heard it here first. Unless you heard it from one of us already. Then you heard it here second.

We're moving!

To Arkansas!

I can hardly believe it myself. It still feels a little surreal. The short version of the story is this:

Jan 2012 we make our last non-mortgage debt payment. WOO HOO! Jan 2012 (the next day) we find out we are pregnant. Baby is coming, let's save up our cash for those improvements we've been wanting to do for awhile. We get rid of the termites. We get the outside of the house repaired and painted. We install new hardwood floors.


Ben sees job posting for Fayetteville. Thinks "Huh, I wonder what it would be like to move to Fayetteville even though I've always said I'll never live in Arkansas." He should have known better since he also once said he'd never live in California.

Ben poses idea to Rebekah. Rebekah passes out is surprised.

Ben starts looking for jobs there. He gets in touch with recruiters. He has several interviews for two positions at a company. In both cases, they decide to go with an internal candidate but encourage him to keep applying.

Joshua shows up. :-D

We get approached by no fewer than three real estate agents who tell us that demand is high for our neighborhood and there have been multiple backup offers on all recent sales. Would we be interested in selling? (Why yes, yes we would) A house down the street with the same floor plan as ours (but fewer upgrades) sold for the exact amount we bought ours for in 2008. They tell us we might actually make money on our house! We pass out are surprised.

We get a card in the mail offering $100 off "our next long distance move." (Um, here's your sign?)

Rebekah mentions to her boss that they are looking to relocate, and he confirms that she can keep her job and work from home, wherever home is.

Ben talks to a recruiter about an opening at a different company. Two days later he has a phone interview. A week later he flies to Fayetteville for an interview. The day after he gets back he gets a verbal offer. Then they up the offer. Due to the holidays and such, it took a few weeks to get the final written offer, but we got it on January 7th and accepted it January 8th! Ben's first day is February 25th.

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I won't try to include in this blog post my emotions about leaving. I don't think I'm quite ready to face them yet. :-/ But there's no denying that this is the right thing for us and for Joshua. He will get to grow up knowing what "land" looks like. He might even get to have a puppy (because Daddy is not having an inside dog haha). He will have parents who aren't commuting an hour each way. He will know what seasons are. He will get to spend time with his great grandma (Mamaw). He will get to grow up going to the lake with his grandparents, spending time on the boat, learning to ski (like we did). Mommy and Daddy might actually have some money left for traveling to show him the world (and certainly for coming back to visit his birthplace!).

And maybe he'll be able to convince his Granddad and Nana to move here too. ;-)

Please pray for us over the next few months as we work out the logistics around a cross-country move with an infant. And please, if you are in the Fayetteville area...I need info! Neighborhoods, schools, doctors, churches, childcare providers (I'll be looking for a full time nanny ASAP).

Thanks for reading!
Rebekah

Thoughts at 2 Months

Joshua my love...I can't believe you've been here for two months already. We've been praying and hoping for you to be here for a little over two years now. It's been a full two years. We've grieved for your older brother or sister. We've wondered what was taking so long (turns out you've been stubborn every step of the way). We've experienced raw hope at finding out you were on your way. We've been anxious about hearing your heart beat (well mostly I was anxious...your daddy is rock solid) and seeing you on the ultrasound. We've felt inexplicable joy at meeting you for the first time.

You look so different now from the day you were born, it's hard to believe how much you've grown.

Here are some developmental milestones you've met so far:

• Growing like a weed. You have grown from 20 inches to 24 3/4 inches! You've gained almost 5 pounds (8 lbs, 14 oz at birth to 13 lbs, 12 oz at 2 month checkup)!
• Smiling on purpose. I think you managed a smile for me at 3 weeks 3 days, but I caught it on video on your 1 month birthday. Proof! Now you smile at us all the time.
• Holding your head up. You lifted your head during tummy time when you were less than 2 weeks old! Now you have no problem holding your head still while we hold you propped up, and at 8 weeks 6 days you sat in the Bumbo for the first time. You didn't like it very much.
• Batting at toys. You started this around 6 weeks I think. You aren't quite controlled enough yet to reach out and grab a specific toy, but you know that if you flail around your arms you'll hit the toys hanging from the bar over your play mat. 
• Tracking movement by moving your eyes and turning your head. I don't remember exactly when you started doing this, but you've been very alert almost from day 1.
• Grasping. You can hold fingers or small toys for a short period of time, though I'm not sure you know what you are doing yet or how to keep holding on.
• Clasping your hands together. You just started doing this more around the 8 week mark, right before your 2 month check up.
• Bringing your hands to your mouth on purpose to suck on them. You have definitely started all the pre-teething signs. Lots of drooling and sucking on your fingers. This is quite handy in the car when you've spit your pacy out...yay for self-soothing!
• Cooing and "talking." You sure make a lot of funny noises. Sometimes you coo at us like you are telling us a story or how you are feeling. Sometimes it seems like you are just talking to yourself. :-) I think you inherited this from mommy.
• Kicking. Ok, let's be honest. You've been kicking me for more time than you've been alive. But things are looking good for you to be a soccer player like Daddy's hoping. :-) You have a play mat with a piano on the end of it that plays music and makes noise when you kick. This is one of your favorite things to do! It also has a mirror hanging from it, and you really like looking at yourself. We started this around 6 weeks too.

Other firsts:

• First time meeting your Grandad and Grandma Elaine, plus all your Hardwick aunts and uncles.
• First Facetime, a few hours. Met your Uncle Matt.
• First Skype, 3 days. Met (virtually) your Grandma Massmann, then met your Paw Paw and Grandma Norma.
• First bath at home, 5 days.
• First outing, 6 days. Sorry, buddy, Mommy needs to get out of the house! We went to Target and Costco (Ok, you stayed in the car with Grandma) and ate lunch outside at The Corner Bakery.
• First family baby sitter, 1 week 3 days. Grandma Massmann watches you while you sleep. Mommy and Daddy go eat dinner at IHOP.
• First visit to Mommy's work, 2 weeks 1 day.
• First Halloween.
• First trip inside Target, 2 weeks 5 days. Yes, this is an important first. You've since been to Target multiple times. You don't seem to mind as long as you are sleeping or I don't stop to browse (keep it movin'). You are so much like your Daddy.
• First time at church, 2 weeks 6 days.  
• First Thanksgiving
• First time sleeping through the night (8 1/2 hours!), 8 weeks 4 days
• First non-family babysitter, 8 weeks 5 days (2 months on the nose). Mommy and Daddy went to The Melting Pot with friends. You slept most of the time, then woke up and had a bottle, diaper change, and snuggled with your babysitter Hannah. When we got home we played a little bit and then you went right back to sleep and slept most of the way through the night again!

Things you like:

• Your swing.
• Snuggling on daddy's chest.
• Mommy singing to you when you are trying to go to sleep. For some reason, my repertoire includes a strange mix of lullabies (Hush Little Baby, Twinkle Twinkle, and Rock-a-Bye Baby), Christmas songs (Silent Night, Away in a Manger), and worship songs/hymns from my childhood (I Love You Lord, Worthy of Worship). It's funny what melodies and lyrics come to you in the middle of the night.
• (Sometimes) your pacifier. We held off trying this until almost 4 weeks. You still don't quite have the hang of it and usually spit it out after a few minutes. 
• Being swaddled. You like your arms out though.
• Looking at yourself in the mirror.
• Riding in the car and riding in the stroller. You usually fall asleep!
• Your bouncer seat.

I look forward to writing another post at 3 months to document all your changes and firsts. You've got a lot coming this month, from your first (and second, third, fourth, and fifth) airplane ride to meeting lots of family and friends!

We love you so very much and pray for you every day. We pray for your health, your development, your future, and most importantly your faith and growth in Christ.

XOXO,
Mommy

Today I'm proud of...LEAH!

Yes, I started this thing last Thanksgiving when I wrote this post. I intended to finish a post for each family member in just a few months. Turns out I only managed to write two blog posts in a full 12 months. Lame!

Well anyway, this is the 3rd installment, and hopefully the rest are coming soon!

Today I'm thankful for...my sister Leah.

I'm so thankful for her heart for others. I'm truly amazed at Leah's tireless efforts to find families and raise funds for children on the other side of the world through her work with Reece's Rainbow. She is an advocate, prayer warrior, cheerleader, funds-raiser, volunteer, and awareness-raiser. I sometimes get overwhelmed thinking about all the need in the world. Countless children have been abandoned, institutionalized, and neglected simply for having an extra chromosome or other disability. What can one person really do? But Leah doesn't give up! She is tireless and refuses to give up hope that every precious baby will find a forever family. From consignment sales to change drives to awareness walks to blogging to garage sales to giveaways, she's constantly trying to think of new ways to raise money for these kiddos and their families. While I'm busy thinking about myself, my needs, my kid, my husband (my, my, my), she's focused on the world outside our comfortable surroundings.

So to honor her, let me share these two cuties with you. Leah is always helping other families and other kiddos, but these two girlies are special to her. She has committed to advocate for them, especially Celine.

She has helped raise thousands of dollars for Celine over the past couple of years (check out Leah's blog here), and Celine's adoption grant is almost $30,000! That means when a family finds Celine and wants to adopt her, most of the costs will be covered. This is a huge blessing for this dear little one.You can help by donating to her fund or by sharing her story. Maybe you know someone who will end up being her family? Or maybe it's you! Leah has a goal of raising $1000 this Christmas for Celine (she is her Angel Tree Warrior). Donate $35 or more to get an ornament honoring this special child. Just click on the link and use ctrl+f to find her name on the page. Donations to this cause are Leah's main Christmas gift request this year. Leah is also always on the lookout for items (electronics, handmade items, gift cards) to be donated for benefit giveaways/auctions...let me know if you are interested!

Cora Lynne is also dear to Leah's heart, and your support for her is also much appreciated. Both girls are getting older (6 and 7 I believe) and are facing the move from the orphanage to the institution. As much as these babies fail to develop in their existing circumstances, they face even greater detriment once they are transferred. I wrote a little about the conditions in these institutions in my post about Sarah.

I'm also thankful for Leah's love for all things baby. She was such a huge help to me getting ready for Joshua's birth, and she's already a wonderful aunt! We had a great time sorting through clothes, putting together all his gear, and making plans. I'm proud of how she's stepped up at her church by faithfully volunteering in the nursery. It takes a special person to hang out with crying infants and dirty diapers by choice. :-)

She also spends a lot of time volunteering at and fundraising for the Alternatives Pregnancy Center. She wants to make sure these mommas and babies have nice things to "buy" at the little store they have. She's a serious bargain hunter and makes a beeline for the clearance racks at almost every store she's in, just to look for new cute clothes to provide for the center.




I'm truly inspired by Leah's selfless attitude and desire to make a difference in the world around her, as well as her faith. She's a special sister and I couldn't be more proud. I only hope that my post today might help those causes that are so near and dear to her heart.

I miss you girly, and I can't wait to see you at Christmas!

Love, Rebekah

No baby yet...but SOON!

I’m nearly a week overdue now (Monday marks 41 weeks), and I know everyone is wondering when this kid is going to show up! :-) So I wanted to let you know what was going on. If Baby M doesn’t decide to come on his own before tomorrow night, we’ll be headed to the hospital on Sunday evening (right at the end of that Cardinals game!) to start getting ready to induce! We are so excited to meet our little guy!

And now I hope you’ll allow me to be a bit vulnerable. I have to admit I was a little afraid to put anything online at all. I’m afraid of well-intentioned “advice” or opinions about how we have decided to proceed. You see I’m a little emotionally worn out at the moment, and I really need cheerleaders, not debates.

However, I didn’t want to let this fear keep me from being excited about birthing this baby, or for updating the many many people out there who have been so excited and encouraging throughout the pregnancy. Not to mention, I would really appreciate your prayers and support for a safe labor and healthy baby! SO I decided to go ahead and put the update out there.

You might be wondering what went into our decision to schedule induction. But guess what?

It doesn’t matter.

If there’s anything I’ve learned while being pregnant it’s that every woman, every baby, every pregnancy is different. There’s no “right” way to get pregnant, be pregnant, go into labor, or birth. Really. I promise.

Meds. No meds. Pitocin. Natural attempts at induction. Epidural. No epidural. Caesarean. Vaginal. VBAC. Birthing center. Home birth. Hospital. Midwife. OBGYN. Family practitioner. Doula. RN. Birth plan. No birth plan. Birth plan gone awry. Breastfeeding. Formula. And on and on…

None of these choices make you more or less of a woman or a mom.

*Gasp.*

The thing is, birth decisions are just precursors for all the decisions we will make that will impact this child’s life. Bottom line, we love our child and want to do what is best for him. So we have (and will) gather information, analyze the data, and make the best decision we can. THAT is what matters. There will be times we realize in hindsight that we didn’t make the best decision. There will be times as a mom that I agonize over whether I made the right decision or not…and I may never know. There will be times when we are right on with our decisions. And I’m certain there will be times we struggle to make a seemingly difficult decision that ends up having no lasting impact whatsoever.

This is just parenthood. And we’re all just doing the best we can with the knowledge, resources, abilities, and information that we have. And even if there were a “perfect” method, I’m not even sure I’d want to know about it, because I feel like the world would be a little boring if everyone was the same.

This concludes both my update and my mini-rant. Unless this little dude decides to get rockin’ in the next 24 hours, look for an update sometime Monday morning!

Love you guys bunches!

Rebekah